Oh, hell, I did it again. Something doesn’t like me writing my blog, and I think it’s me. Procrastination and distraction, ahoy!

So, in order to catch you up on Life as Jey Knows It, welcome to my post of fake Twitter updates AS IF THIS WAS HOW IT HAPPENED, BORING UPDATES AND ALL. Let’s party like it’s the 26th March 2009!

• Saw a preview of the movie Earth - in a cinema that’s also a restaurant (oh, America). All footage seems to be from the BBC Nature Team. Beautiful, but with way too much personification of the animals.
• Turns out grabbing a pan handle that’s just been in the oven is a bad idea. 2nd degree burn, had to go to emergency room without insurance. Prescribed: Bandage, Wait Time: 7 hours, Bill: $340
• Went to see Yoroi: The Samurai Zombie at AFI Dallas - comedy amounts of gore. Best moment: A severed policeman’s head and arm saluting as they fly in to the air.
• Started making a website on handcrafted products since we like them lots. Launched it fast, got real in to it… for a little while.
• Visited the Deep Ellum Arts Festival (Dallas has ARTS!) where we partook in some Funnel Cake - a flat doughnut like thing covered in icing sugar. Nom. There were also some crafts, I am just blinded by cake.
• Bought a PS3 - finally, I can feel like I have a next gen console. Even if all I use it as is a media center.
• Easter time! Had Easter dinner at Lau’s dad’s. Got basket full of sweet-filled eggs.
• Morality getting me down. Decided it was time to go vegan. Stopped buying all dairy, started buying soy milk, yoghurt, sour cream. Way, way easier than expected, but still think it will be a while before I am fully vegan. Miss cheese.
• Get bill in post from hospital. Did we say $340, OH SORRY COUGH, we meant $980. We shall fight.
• Experiment with opening a Zazzle Store. Feels like something I could really get in to if I made the effort. Photoshop many photos and products together, but you need hundreds to be noticed.
• Head to the Funky Finds Spring Fling in Fort Worth. Lots of Etsy sellers hoiking their wares. Accidentally stumble upon a kid’s beauty pageant. AGHH, tweens in makeup!
• Hack week at Moshi. Got way in to it, and worked with Mike on the new minigame scripting language and also hacked Jabber chat in to Moshi myself. (Oh, we won, but I am too far away for a prize I guess ;))
• Submitted all the forms to the US govt to allow me to Adjust My Status (and hence, get a green card), to work when my current visa expires and, oh, to allow me to leave the country.
• Went to a Turkish screening at the USA Film Fest to see “On the Count of Zero”. One of the first of its genre for Turkish film - blending in local mythology. Spoke to the Director and Screenwriter afterwards, who were kind enough to drop us off a DVD and give us their contact deets.
• Got incredibly in to investing. Only the theoretical side so far. I am a Buffett follower, and am trying to suck up all the info I can before actually entering the field. My v.short 1-month virtual stock exchange companies made 8% - reasonable - I know I can do better than that.
• Saw Flight of the Conchords LIVE! Wooop, they were very good. They made fun of the absurd number of condom shops in Dallas. Srsly, what is that about?
• Vegan life is going great! There are so many more products out there than I realised. Found out about Dr. Cow’s 3-month aged nut cheeses. They look epic, but are super-expensive for the size.
• Been frantically trying to get house in to order, and we’re making progress. Have a clean kitchen, an office/crafts area, rearranged bedroom and Much Less Clutter.
• Watched the entirety of Battlestar Galactica in a very, very brief period of time. Got an intense emotional attachment to it; it’s the best series I’ve seen in a long time.
• ROOOOAD TRIPPPP to Houston! Lau and I set off on a 250 mile each way weekend trip to Houston.
• Hit up Boggy Lake in the middle of nowhere. Small national park, with lots of local families in the lake. Less creepy than imagined.
• Got a bargain hotel for $50 on Priceline’s “name your price” service. Was lovely, and got a free warm cookie.
• Went to the Hobbit Cafe (decorated with LotR merch) because of its veggie recommendations. Was oookay.
• Next morning, drove through a huge storm to Galveston, post-hurricane-smashing. Awesome sun, fun swimming and only a tiny jellyfish sting for Lau.
• EPIC DRIVE BACK! 50 miles out of Dallas, the engine warning light comes on, then the ABS, then the airbags, then the car loses power in the middle of nowhere.
• Stuck outside Freedom Tattoos in darkness for 2 hours waiting for a tow truck.
• Investigation of more vegan cheeses include a new product called Daiya - not made of soy either, and apparently it melts, grates, just like normal. They’re marketing it to restaurants rather than consumers - I like that idea. Luckily, veganstore.com is packing it in to bags themselves - ordering soon!
• Living without a car sucks. Get new alternator and battery from a good mechanic. $600 as opposed to the $1400 the dealership wanted.
• Watched Caprica, the prequel pilot to BSG. Very different, but nonetheless very good. I look forward to seeing how it pans out.
• Working on a little minigame of my own, because you know, why not - it’s super simple, so this should increase the small likelihood I’ll finish it.
• Dallas has far more vegan restaurants than you’d imagine. A raw food cafe with rave reviews just around the corner, some great Asian buffets and the all-round Spiral Diner. I shall support you!
• Biometrics appointment for my work permit and adjustment of status = done. They had an awesomely high tech fingerprinting machine. Easy part so far…

So there’s probably a load more things I’ve forgotten. But… well, I’ve forgotten them. If I’ve not spoken to you, this makes you pretty much up to date!

If I was Guy, I would’ve made this in to a song, but I can’t Do music, so there.

See you in 3 months… or hopefully less.